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A Career Girl's Guide to Becoming a Stepmom: Expert Advice from Other Stepmoms on How to Juggle Your Job, Your Marriage, and Your New Stepkids, by Jacquelyn B. Fletcher
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About the Author
Jacquelyn B. Fletcher is a freelance writer, marketing and publishing professional, stepdaughter, and stepmother of three young children. She writes for Your Stepfamily and Daughters, and has contributed to numerous other publications. She teaches writing at the Loft Literary Center in Minneapolis, where she lives.
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Product details
Paperback: 352 pages
Publisher: Harper Perennial (May 8, 2007)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0060846836
ISBN-13: 978-0060846831
Product Dimensions:
5.3 x 0.8 x 8 inches
Shipping Weight: 1.1 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review:
4.7 out of 5 stars
34 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#205,912 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
Really great read and perfect for women coming into a relationship with no children of her own. Most stepmom books seem to focus (at least from what I've read) on generality and many aren't of the perspective specifically if the woman does not have kids of her own. Keep in mind when reading these books that we all have our own experiences so I have to remind myself that just because other examples/scenarios played out a certain way or challenging, that that doesn't indicate that my experience with my step kids will also be 100% that way. Keep your head up, stay positive and if you truly invest in spending time with the kids and getting on their level that you'll build the respect you both want and need.
I've found this book to be a great introduction to step parenting for someone who doesn't have kids, doesn't plan on having kids, and never planned on them in the first place. Jacquelyn incorporates anecdotal situations from a variety of step parenting families that she's interviewed which covers the spectrum of situations (on good terms with bio-mom, not on good terms with bio-mom, young kids, old kids, etc.) She uses business terminology to introduce concepts of step parenting, but you don't have to be a corporate type to understand or appreciate them. The book also includes lists and examples of things you need to talk to your partner about, and I found them to be helpful conversation starters.
For any woman following a successful professional career path, while at the same time approaching the dauntingly complex web of stepmotherhood, this book provides invaluable advise and direction toward a safe, concrete plan of approach to becoming a stepmother. I found many great points in this book even though this is about the third book on stepmothering I have read, My favorite part is at the end of each chapter, she provides questions for both yourself and your partner to discuss together in regards to the topics covered in each section. This book has helped me to solidify my approach to a situation that previously I found to be expectantly negative in general, in a manner that gives me the confidence I usually only reserve for work. I now look forward to finding my place in my new family. Highly recommended!
This past fall I married a man with 2 children from a previous marriage - hence entering the world of stepmotherhood. I never ever thought I'd be here. I had spent the better majority of my life working hard to further my career and continue to find that part of my life both rewarding and very fulfilling. I knew likely I would marry - I had great interest in the companionship and lifelong partnership that would bring. But I have never had quite the same desire to be a mom, let alone a stepmom. Life has a funny way of interjecting an alternate path when you least expect it!Since I met the kids almost 4 years ago, and knowing my relationship with their father was going to be serious, I started searching for support help and doing a lot of reading. But so much out there just never felt like it fit me...negativity, horror stories, or just basic differences - like me not bringing any kids into the equation on my side. I felt like the odd man out, and often felt more alien to stepmotherhood (or the possibility of it) than before I started reading. It is an ongoing "battle" for me. There are some days where I feel very confident in my role as stepmom. There are other days (many more than I would like to admit) where I feel out of sorts and paralyzed almost by the two kids running through my house.But with this book my feelings were very different. I found myself affirming some of the lines with noticeable head nods and even outloud comments like "I'm not the only one" and "I knew it wasn't just me." It was great. It was like finding a positive, comforting and empathetic friend who spoke with candor and honesty but also with heart and passion for making stepmotherhood more welcoming, more understood, and most importantly, more valued than it often is.So many stepmoms, especially those who bring no children of their own into the relationship, struggle to find their place with the children. And also come to terms with what this change means for them - both with their husband and with their career/independent life. My big struggle continues to be how to balance my professional life - which is probably the best it's ever been right now - with a personal life that to some extent, I never imagined myself a part of. But slowly, each day gets better, a little easier, more comfortable. Thanks largely in part to a very strong, supportive husband.Ms. Fletcher's book was refreshing, positive, and very helpful. Put it at the top of your list if you are going to be involved as a stepmother, now or in the future. Few take on the topic like Jacque does.
Great book for women, who like me are completely new to the family world. Taking on my partner and his son after years of being single was a huge shock and I couldn't understand why my emotions and rationality had completely gone out the window. This book helped me understand why I felt the way I did and methods to help me adapt. My relationship with my partner and stepson is now stronger than ever.
This is a great book for both stepmoms and step moms to be! I am in a serious relationship with a man with a toddler and this book was extremely helpful! It does a wonderful job of validating all the negative and challenging feelings (feelings I didnt even know others had too!) that comes with being in the step mom role but doesn't allow you to wallow in pity-and it's done in such an empowering and encouraging way. Jacque provides practical and reasonable solutions to handle a variety of challenges in an honest and endearing way that often ends up making you smile. This book hit so close to home and provided great opportunities for me and my boyfriend to talk and have a better understanding of each others perspective. Read the book, ladies! Your soul will be lifted, I promise!
I am in serious relationship with a man who has 3 children. I'm only 30 pages into this book and have already dog-eared more than 5 pages. I relate so much to how the woman feel in this book and it has really opened my eyes up to what I'm really getting myself into. If you are struggling with being a stepmom or possibly becoming a stepmom, then this book is for you!! You will feel so much better having something to relate to. Also my boyfriend is very interested in reading it with me so it isn't just for the stepmom/soon to be stepmom but also the significant other too! Great book!!!!! =)
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